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shootuptill5ami think its hard to be 20 and trying to figure everything out. every day gives me a new lesson that hits me in the stomach and makes me want to yak up poison. i swallow it down and it flows to my heart and it gets tainted and too much to hold. the pain in my chest is overwhelming, but i carry on anyway.
if there's one thing i can praise myself for, its my resilience and perseverance. i've grown to hate both words. but if someone were to ask me to pick a couple words to describe myself, i would choose those. i think that says something. i hate that i've experienced so many things that makes me choose those words. every so often i think i run out of fight, out of energy that makes me able to get through it all, but i push through anyway. it's impressive and sickening.
i miss too much, and i want too much, but i find myself back at the beginning of the same cycle whenever a big lesson gets thrown at me. maybe the universe is asking me to learn from my 'mistakes', but i am me. and i will continue to carry hope with me, even if i am hopeless.
may march be better here on out. this month is already a tough time of year.
if there's one thing i can praise myself for, its my resilience and perseverance. i've grown to hate both words. but if someone were to ask me to pick a couple words to describe myself, i would choose those. i think that says something. i hate that i've experienced so many things that makes me choose those words. every so often i think i run out of fight, out of energy that makes me able to get through it all, but i push through anyway. it's impressive and sickening.
i miss too much, and i want too much, but i find myself back at the beginning of the same cycle whenever a big lesson gets thrown at me. maybe the universe is asking me to learn from my 'mistakes', but i am me. and i will continue to carry hope with me, even if i am hopeless.
may march be better here on out. this month is already a tough time of year.
