(no subject)

i had more written before this but i deleted my ramble because with everything it really does just boil down to me thinking ‘why wasn’t i enough’ and why you did that. i miss all of it but most of all the you i got to know because now it feels stiff and semi-awkward


feelings spiiiilllinnnggg… i’ll clean it up later

coffee shop menu is staring at me

i try to put my writing brain on but i am woooorn out today...eek

i started my finals week today, it seems to be okay so far.. not my best choice to go out last night, but i persevere. how could i not? my friends hosted the event and the lineup of djs were too good to miss. honestly i didn't even get to sleep in my own bed last night since i went right to the library to study. and yes that did fail, i stayed up for an hour before i decided to sleep until 12 minutes before my final. i don't think i did awful, but i don't think i did too great either? some may blame this on me going out the night prior but i knew it wouldn't be a great outcome regardless so yolooooo.

today i had to finish a long-term-assigned project that i THOUGHT was due today originally... bless my professor for giving me an extension until today. i was so focused and so locked in, i swear i haven't done that in months... but the day is not over!!! i still have so much to do. i'm swamped in work and craving winter break more than anything. i need it more than water

unfortunately today has also reminded me of my regret of not pursuing music. taking classes in the production building kills me because i see everyone following their passion. i wanna tap in i wanna be a part of the scene. lots 2 do, i'll get there though

speaking of music. i'm bumping vocaloid right now of all things. haven't done that in so long

i'm reeeeally not wanting to finish the other work i have tonight. alas. i will drink my coffee (as if i needed more caffeine today) and push through. bye